Check It Out

As a woman severely challenged in the hospitality area, I'm in awe of those of you who do it with such ease. I love to have company over and to do the decorating piece. I might even fool you by serving a decent meal, but I'm letting you in on a secret. After you leave, I collapse for days and my family has to forgive me for wicked meaness for the week before.

I have a friend who exemplifies grace and ease in the hospitality field, though. She challenges me to up my game in this important area. Please go visit LeAnn Rice's new blog She Cooks. It's beautiful, and I guarantee that she'll have some of the best recipes ever there.

Panic, Chest Pains and a Shift

Wouldn't you know that after writing a post about waking up smiling, the day would fall apart? I really don't mean that to be pessimistic. Usually I am a "glass half full" kind of girl. In fact, my perkiness has been known to annoy others.

There should have been one of those warning signals at the beginning of the day yesterday, though. You know that horrible sound that emanates from the television right before the announcement, "This has been a test of the emergency broadcast system..."? Yesterday, I needed a heads-up that a test was coming.

Barry is in on the test too, and it seems that the instrument (of the devil) that is being used to test us are the computers and electronics in our household. My laptop has refused to send new emails for about a month now. Yesterday I got really determined. I'm in no way a computer whiz, but I got determined to find someone to help me.

Without boring you with the details, hours and many "solutions" later my computer still will not send emails.

But that's mild compared to Barry's test. The hard drive on his 4 month old computer crashed yesterday. So far the verdict is "irreparable and irretrievable". Months of work gone. Forever.

My day continued with 2 fillings being replaced and the pronouncement that I need a crown. Please excuse me for asking if you fall in this category, but isn't that for old people? Wow, that's me.

This morning the saga continued. I woke up panicking about 5 am and wasn't able to go back to sleep, so I headed for my quiet time spot for a much-needed attitude adjustment. Jesus was so sweet and gave such encouragement this morning.

I'm so glad I made the decision to get up and receive my portion, because this morning the tv has conked out and the desk-top computer registered completely full. (This is evidence that I am a technology illiterate since I had no idea that I should be checking, "cleaning", etc. Who needs one more thing to clean anyway?)

About this time, the pressure in my chest started to be pretty overwhelming, but here's the good part. Completely at the end of ourselves (a very hard and very good place to be), Barry and I sat on the floor and prayed. At the end of our time with the Lord, we came to some important realizations.

1. We are blessed. The fact that we are freaking out about our stuff dying is a clear sign that we're too dependent on it. Less stuff more Jesus and relationships is the clear call.

2. We have a 13-year-old whose been all by himself with us since Sunday, and we haven't taken advantage of it. Bad deal.

So this afternoon while the computer upstairs cleans itself (gotta love that!), we're going to spend the afternoon with our boy. The deadlines will still be there. The computers will still be in the shop. My old tooth will still need something to hold it together. But hopefully when we return we'll be refocused on the right things and ready to move forward in the right ways.

See you later! I'm off to iceskate on this 100 degree day!

Random

I woke up with random thoughts in my head today but with a smile on my face. That doesn't always happen, but today it did. Here are some of the things that are making me smile:

• The perma-grin on my 16-year-old son's face as he climbed into the church van to go to camp this week with 7 girls and their chaperons.
• Watching my youngest and his friend horse-play at the pool last night.
• Listening to Barry and his word-play.
• The daisies blooming outside my window.
• Sitting at the table in my morning mu-mu (This is a sight to behold, I assure you.)
• Knowing that I walk upstairs to work.
• Thinking about how much I love my work.
• Hearing the air-conditioning come on when it's going to be over 90 degrees again today. It makes me sweat to think about it.
• Anticipating weekend time with friends.
• Celebrating our youth pastor's 25th year at our church. What an amazing gift!
• Looking forward to reading more of a book that's making me think out of the box.

It was funny to read Rachel's devotion today, because that's how I feel this morning--zesty! I hope you have a zesty day, too.

Holding On for Dear Life

When my devotion ran last week, there were so many comments left on the blog that tugged at my heart. I was glad that so many of you applied the principal to your own circumstances--dealing with divorce (and waiting for redemption), full-time motherhood, and joblessness.

This comment from Anonymous cried out to be addressed:

"Amy, I cling to that verse at this time in my life, but somehow I am finding less and less comfort in it. My husband has been out of work for almost 2 years and we were just served foreclosure papers on our home. We have been married for 24 years and have 3 wonderful children. I am scared to death and can't see any good in what is going on. How do I hold on to my faith at a time like this? Please pray that God sends a job for my husband soon. Otherwise, I fear we will be homeless."

Anonymous, first of all my heart aches for you and your family. I woke up this morning praying for you, and I'll be praying as I post this that God's provision shows itself in miraculous and unforeseen ways. I'm praying that God calms your fears as you seek Him and that He fills you with His own peace that is untied from our circumstances.

Your question, "How do I hold on to my faith at a time like this?" is such a foundational question. .There are no easy answers, but there are two answers that I'd like to offer from those who are far wiser than I.

1. In hard times we hold on to our faith by reading scripture and believing what it says about God's character. My friend Linda, as she was dying from breast cancer, would constantly remind me, "No matter what happens to me, Amy, God is still good." God's character is unchanging. Scripture tells us that He is good. He is love. He is wise, loving and righteous. When our circumstances don't see to match those truths, we have to hold on to the ageless truths about God's character until the circumstances change.

CS Lewis said it this way, "We want not so much a father in heaven as a grandfather in heaven--whose plan for the universe was such that it might be said at the end of each day, 'A good time was had by all.' I should very much like to live in a universe which was governed on such lines, but since it is abundantly clear that I don't, and since I have reason to believe nevertheless that God is love, I conclude that my conception of love needs correction.... it is natural for us to wish that God had designed for us a less glorious and less arduous destiny; but then we are wishing not for more love but for less."

2. My favorite name for God is Redeemer. He is a faithful redeemer. He promises to use all things for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purposes. Like you, Anonymous, I've been in places where I could not conceive of how it could possibly be turned into good.

Lysa Terkeurst has provided a free resource called "When God Hurts My Feelings" on how we can handle times when we are disappointed with God. She points out that so often we begin to ask "Why?" during these times and that it's not the right question. She says, "If asking the why question doesn't offer hope, what will? The what question. In other words: Now that this is my reality, what am I supposed to do with it?....ask God the following questions: What do you want me to do with what has happened? What can I learn from this?....What maturity could God be building in to me?"

Asking the what question allows us peeks into God's redemption even before circumstances change, and it fuels hope.

There are no easy answers to the question "How do I hold on to my faith during hard times?" If you are a reader and are seeking answers to this very question, I'd again like to refer you to wiser people. Here's a list of books I've read as I've sought the answer to the same question:

Where is God When It Hurts? by Philip Yancey

When Life and Beliefs Collide by Carolyn Custis James

A Grace Disguised by Jerry Sittser

Freshen Up

On Monday, I want to address a serious question that came up in the comments on Tuesday. Today I'm a little fried though, so I'm doing light.

Remember my commitment not to spend (much) money decorating my office? Well, I had some tired lamp shades that I decided to "Amy-ize". Here they are:

First I went and bought some fabic and trims. Joanne's had everything 60% off. Love a bargin!

Then I made a pattern with some paper like this:


I cut it out, sprayed the lampshade with spray adhesive and smoothed on the fabric. Even though I know that modern and sleek is "in", I still like some froo-froo, so I glued on trim. Clothes pins worked great to hold everything together while it dried.

Voila! Here is my Goodwill lamp all spray-painted and froo-frooed. It's sitting on my desk and makes me smile to look at it.

I had another lamp that I love with a shade that needed some pizzaz. Here's how it turned out...

I'm thinking about cutting off the tassels on this one and just leaving the scalloped edge on the trim. Any thoughts on that?

God's Plans

I hope you’re having a great day, friends! I always love devotion days, because I get to hear from so many of you. Your words always encourage and challenge me. If you haven’t read today’s Encouragement for Today, pop right over and visit our P31 blog too.

Jeremiah 29:11 says, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” It’s a verse that reminds us that God has a Plan A for each of us. Although He doesn’t promise a perfect life with no pain or interruptions, we can rest in the knowledge that in His goodness He doesn’t waste anything. He uses everything, and as our children’s pastor always used to say, “God’s way is always best.”

Carolyn Custis James has written one of the few books that I reread periodically, When Life and Beliefs Collide. In it, she tells a story of how her family was uprooted in a move to England for her husband’s career. She found that although the move was for her husband she was included in “Plan A”.

She says this, “No other plan takes precedence over the one he has planned for you. Your story isn’t a spin-off of what God is doing in someone else’s life. He runs the world as if you were his only concern. It works that way for all of us.”

Recently, my Sunday school class discussed a beautiful illustration of this from the book of Ruth. After studying the 4 chapters of the book in depth for weeks, one of our final impressions was how God worked all things to the good of every person in the story—Ruth, Naomi and Boaz.

He will surely do the same for you! If you’d like to read about my personal experience with the unfolding of God’s plan, please visit last week’s posts from Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

I’d love to hear your story of God’s divine unfolding in your life!

A Space of My Own

For two years, one of the walls in my bedroom has looked a little like this. (I didn't take the picture until I had masked out the base board.)

This weekend, the wall that leads up to a space of my own got painted.

Last week, I sat down with my sweet hubby for a serious conversation.

"Uh, honey...?

"Yes?"

"So next year we're both going to be working from home."

"Uh-huh."

"Won't it be nice to get to go out to lunch dates sometimes?"

"Yes."

(Pregnant pause.)

"Well there's one more thing about working from home that I want to ask you."

"OK"

"Could I have the office?"

That got his full attention. Barry doesn't use the office much, but it's been his domain. He paused only a minute before grinning and saying "yes".

My own space? Yippy yahoo!!!!!

Now I'm embarassed to tell you that it's been a somewhat neglected space in the decorating department. All of a sudden, I have a new passion for decorating the office, though!

I made a promise to myself that I wouldn't spend (much) money decorating. I'm going to imitate The Nester and shop the house. Low and behold I found some spray painting projects, and I do dearly love spray paint.

There's this chair that I almost gave a way a couple of weeks ago. I spray painted it back and reupholstered it with curtain fabric from my house in Burlington....

And this lamp that I bought months ago at Goodwill. It used to be hunter green, but now it's black. I'm going to spruce up the shade with some new fabic and fringe and then I'll show you the finished project.

Thanks, Honey Bunch, for giving up your space and letting me have it for my very own. Smooches to you! There's going to be some very good work done here!

Dreams Come True

So there I was in February. I was committed to finishing the school year, but I knew I wasn't going back the following year. My heart's desire was to spend my time in ministry, but I didn't have any idea what that was going to look like. I knew I couldn't just call Lysa Terkeurst and say, "I'm available! Please make a job for me at Proverbs 31 Ministries." :)

I prayed and I thought, but nothing hit me. Every time I started searching the internet for jobs, God clearly told me to stop. I love a plan, and I was struggling without one. My friend Luann reminded me, though, that the safest place to be is in the middle of God's will. Part of me was nervous, but the other part was excited to see what God was going to do.

Then it happened. On a trip with my friend Holly, I was expressing just what the support of our P31 team means to me. "When I want a message critiqued," I said, "I go to Karen Ehman. When I need help with values statements, Lysa provides training with Rob Eager and then Melanie Chitwood helps me refine it. When I need another set of eyes for my new bio sheet, Renee and LeAnn help," I gushed. I finished with, "I don't know how other women in ministry do it. It would be so hard not to have our team."

Holly sat reflecting for a minute, and then she said, "Maybe that's your job." Maybe that's my job? Maybe that's my job... Maybe that's my job!!!!!

The answer gave that solid "click" in my heart, and I knew that God had answered my prayers and birthed a new dream.

Without belaboring any more details (I know it's already too late to make a long story short!!), I'd like to announce a new arm of Proverbs 31 Ministries... SHE SHARPENS.

Karen Ehman and I will be launching this new speaker coaching service at She Speaks. If you're a woman in ministry without a team, we'd love to be your team! We want to partner in kingdom building with other women in ministry who want to communicate their message effectively only to make Jesus famous. We'll be working individually with women who want their messages critiqued or who are creating new marketing pieces. The service will officially begin in August, so more details will be coming.

On Monday I went to Matthews and talked about ministry expansion all day. I left feeling ignited--a feeling about work that I haven't experienced in a long time.

I want to encourage each of you. This dream has obviously been a long time in the making. From my story you can hear that it was more of an unfolding than a huge revelation. I look back and see how each previous dream, every previous job and all my experiences have gotten me ready for what I'll be doing. No step has been wasted. Not a moment was lost. If you're waiting on a dream...hold on, sister! "Hope deferred makes the heart sick", so hold on to hope. Watch for what God is doing. He is faithful!

Discovering New Dreams

It's here! It's here! Marybeth Whalen's first novel The Mailbox has been released, and I can't wait to get my hands on it. I ordered 2 copies as gifts this week for a couple of my very favorite people.

Here's the gorgeous trailer for the book just to whet your appetite...

You can order the book here to take on your vacation.

On Monday I started telling the story about how God is moving me into a season of life that's requiring faith. Here's how the shift started...

I followed my dream of teaching for six years. They were years filled with joy, learning and fulfillment. When I found out that I was pregnant with our first child, I happily relinquished my role as teacher for a role that I had also longed for since I was a little girl--mom.

Over the years, God has provided part-time jobs for me that fit around Barry's job, and I had the privilege and honor of living the role of mostly-stay-at-home mom. In the back of my mind, though, I always thought that I'd probably go back to teaching when it was time to return to the workplace.

Over a year ago, I had the chance to go back into the classroom in a very unique situation. I was offered a job in a private school where I taught 4 hours a day 4 days a week. To top it off, I only had 2 students in my tiny classroom! It seemed perfect. I could be home when the boys were home, continue to speak and write and still teach.

There was only one thing missing. My passion for teaching has disappeared.

Years ago I sat across from my friend Christie and listened to her talk about her work with students on their campus. She shared about establishing Bible studies in the dorms, discipleship of the young women she lived with and bringing new leaders in to reach students. At that moment I thought, "I'd do anything to be able to talk to people about Jesus all day long."

I still love teaching and it's still my strength, but now I want to teach God's Word and reach out with the gospel more than anything else.

Don't get me wrong. I worked hard this year, and my struggle brought me to my knees over and over again as I asked God to help me to do my best for His glory. I wanted to do a good job and help my two students love school. But in my heart I knew that this was a close to my little girl dreams.

In February, the director of my school asked me to make a commitment to come back next year. God clearly said, "No". You'd think that it would be easy to obey, but my head wanted to argue with God. "It would be foolish to give up a job without having another one. What if there's nothing else? I contribute to our household budget. I need to know what's next."

"No" was the only answer I got. I prayed and prayed, and suddenly my heart began to fill with faith. If God was shutting this door, He would be faithful to open another. If He was saying "no" to teaching, then there was a "yes" waiting around the corner.

I finally told my director that I wouldn't be back next year. My heart had a few flutters of fear, but excitement flooded my soul too. The world was wide open!

"Lord," I prayed, "would you give me a new dream?" I had no idea how He would provide beyond what I could ask or imagine. His timing, training and provision has blown me away. On Friday I finish the story and make an announcement.

In the meantime, I'd love to hear about your dreams. I'd love to hear about:

• What unfulfilled dreams has God placed in your heart?
• Have you had different dreams in different seasons?
• Do you feel a nudge to fuel your dream with faith and step out? How are you feeling?

Little Girl Dreams

Think back to when you were a little girl. Do you remember your favorite outfit? When I was in fourth grade, my mom bought my one and only pair of Levis. I wore those blue corduroy Levis with a blue turtle neck and thought I looked great. (The pictures say otherwise!)

Do you remember your favorite teacher? I was (and am) a geek, and I LOVED school. I had a string of favorite teachers, but my all-time favorite was my second and third grade teacher, Mrs. Warren. She had espadrilles in all colors of the rainbow which made her beautiful in my eyes, and she gave us Fun Fridays. We got to do crafts as centers and write and perform our own plays. I loved her.

Do you remember summer days with your siblings? My brother and I loved to climb trees. We had a magnolia tree with trees to the top like a ladder. One summer we built a fort up there and spent hours in the shade of our southern "mansion". (We also had a wicked towel-whipping fight that landed me in big trouble.)

Do you remember what you wanted to be when you grew up? Early on, I went through the normal list of vet, nurse, singer and actress (I still want to be a singer! I'm waiting to be discovered.). But once I settled on teaching children, that was it for me. That dream followed me and propelled me into adulthood.

I kept nursery at church. I spent weekends babysitting. I was a nanny during the summers. Eventually I got an education degree and stepped into a classroom. It was the fulfillment of my dreams, and I was filled with passion for teaching.

On my journey of faith, God is calling me to a new dream. Giving up the old, little girl dream is hard. It was my calling and passion for a long time, so it's a little sad to move on to something new. Once again, however, I'm finding myself filled with an excitement and passion that I've been missing for a while. On Wednesday I'll tell you about my next step.

How Is Your Life Different?

I'm reading Francis Chan's book Crazy Love, and I recommend it highly with a warning. Do not read this book if you like being comfortable. Do not read this book if you don't want to spend reading sessions squirming in your seat. Do not read this book unless you are ready to embrace a challenge.

Here's a question that he presents that is haunting me all day as I walk around:

What am I doing that requires faith?

It seems like a simple question but in truth it should be earth shattering. We could expand the question like this:

If I were not a Christian, would my life look different than it looks now?

What would change in my life if I lived the way the Bible says?

How would I behave/live/ spend/ give differently if I really and truly believed that God is exactly who He describes Himself to be in the Bible?

I'm squirming--how about you?

On Monday I'm going to share about an adventure of faith that I'm embarking on. It involves a proposal, a cleaned up office and a very happy girl. I'd love to hear about any adventure of faith that you're living.

A Proverb a Day

It's June which means that at the end of this month, my family will have read half of the Bible. Woot!

We've made it through some rough patches. The law, census results and long passages describing the dimensions of the tabernacle are all important but still hard to get through--especially for teenaged boys.

We're finding ourselves in a refreshing oasis, though--Proverbs. All of us are enjoying the reading, and Anson said last night, "I wish I could have all of this memorized."

In the spirit of being doers of the Word and not just hearers, we've been picking out verses that we each want to apply. As usual, this girl of many words is poked and prodded by all the proverbs about words. Nolan was drawn to one about picking friends. Anson chose one about choosing wisdom. Barry was struck by one about the wisdom of taking correction.

When we finish our year, Proverbs is definitely a place I'd like to come and park again. Here are some of my favorites from last night's reading:

17:1 "Better a dry crust with peace and pquiet than a house full of feasting with strife."

17:9 "He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends."

17:14 "Starting a quarrel is like breaching a dam; so drop the matter before a dispute breaks out."

17:28 "Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent, and discerning if he holds his tongue."

18:2 "A fool finds no pleasre in understanding but delights in airing his own opinions."

18:10 "The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous run into it and are safe."

19:8 "He who gets wisdom loves his own soul; he who cherishes understanding prospers."

19:13 "A foolish son is his father's ruin, and a quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping."

19:20 "Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise."

Did one of these speak to you? Do you have a favorite Proverb?