Peace Making Monday

Sorry I fell off the face of the earth. I had two speaking events last week and found myself having a hard time keeping my head above water. Something had to give, and it was blogging.

I missed our Sunday school class yesterday, because I was doing the last session with the beautiful women of First Presbyterian of Midland, TX. Here's something that jostled loose in my memory as I wrote last week that pertains to peace making, though.

I wrote last week about how hard it is to remember the things we love about the people we love when we're embroiled in conflict. Here's one of the best pieces of marriage advice that I ever received, and it could apply to any relationship.

My pastor Bob Felts said, "When your spouse offends you, ask yourself the question, 'Is that consistent with his character?'"

So if Barry is having a bad day and he snaps at me, instead of holding on to the offense and beginning a string of negative thoughts, I can choose to realize that he is very rarely snappy. Most often he's low-key and patient. I can choose to remember that I have bad days too and give him a break.

Addressing patterns of behavior is a whole other thing, but forgiveness is easier when I remind myself of my husband's/friend's/co-worker's general character.