What If I Don't Know How?

In this morning's devotion, Retreat with Jesus, I share about spending a school day alone with God. As I thought about the blog post for today, I remembered my early days as a Christian and realized that today's devotion would have been completely intimidating to me. "A whole day!" my young self would have thought, "I don't even know how to spend a few minutes with God!"

Maybe you had the same thought. I'd love to share my friend Tara Furman's story about the start of her journey to know God. She is one of the women in my life that inspires me, but she's experienced growth one step at a time too. Here's her story:

For years I attended church, yet God was not REAL to me. What I did know of Him was kept in a "Sunday morning box." When I joined a Bible study, He stayed in my Monday evening box. Looking back, I was merely going through the motions of "religion". I had no idea that the God of the Universe was pursuing a love relationship with me....

One year, God revealed His sense of humor when I was asked to join my study's group of 60+ leaders. What an honor to be a leader! To me these women were spiritual giants. Not because of the Bible facts they knew, but because of the wisdom they exuded in every situation.... They were each the kind of woman I aspired to be. I had great admiration for these women. Now, I was one of them--however by title only.

Inside this circle of Christian women, I saw their surrender and realized I was merely putting on a charade. Outside the circle, I looked and sounded like the rest of the world. The things I did, the places I went, the language I used, the clothes I wore, and the way I handled difficulties did not reflect the title I bore. I had two personalities: One for my church friends, and another for everyone else.

During the years I was privileged to serve with these women, I began to desperately want what these women had. I found myself leaving the leaders' meeting each week begging God to allow me to know Him the way they knew Him. Then one day, God led me to their secret....

The Lord began showing me that the Bible was not to be a book that sits on a shelf. The Bible was not to be brought out just for show on Sunday morning. The Bible was not to be used as a text book for where I could find the answers to the questions for Bible study so that I could attend with all the blanks filled in. The Bible was not to be treated as just another book with idle words written in it--the Bible as to be my life.

That realization began a journey for Tara that led to a rich, deep relationship with Jesus and starting a ministry for other women who long to know Him. Her story is an excerpt from Intimacy with God: Establishing a Vibrant Quiet Time and Prayer Time. I recommend her prayer journal and study highly if you are just learning about spending time with God. To learn more about Tara and to hear her everyday story of learning to know God, visit her at her blog.